You Don't Need an Opinion on Everything
Why letting go of the need to have a stance on every issue can bring you peace and clarity
"So, what do you think about it?" My friend asked, looking at me expectantly. Everyone at the table turned to hear my response to the latest controversy that had taken over social media. As everyone started sharing their strong opinions, I felt that familiar pressure building inside me—the urge to contribute my own thoughts, to prove I was informed, engaged, and smart.
But then I realized something: I didn't actually have a well-formed opinion on this particular issue. I had only read a couple of headlines, hadn't researched multiple perspectives, and honestly, the topic didn't directly impact my life in any meaningful way.
Yet there I was, about to piece together some half-baked thoughts just to participate. Why? Because somewhere along the way, I had absorbed the idea that having an opinion on everything was necessary—that being silent might signal ignorance or apathy.
Instead, I took a breath and simply said, "You know, I haven't looked into this enough to have a thoughtful perspective." The conversation continued without me for a minute, but to my surprise, nobody thought less of me. In fact, later that evening, a friend pulled me aside and said, "I respected that you didn't just talk for the sake of talking."
That moment got me thinking about how much unnecessary mental burden we carry by feeling obligated to form and defend opinions on every topic that crosses our path—from celebrity gossip to global politics, from corporate decisions to stranger's life choices.
The Opinion Overload
We live in the age of information overload. News alerts, social media feeds, and group chats bombard us with issues and events from around the world. There's an implicit expectation that we should care about and have thoughts on all of it.
But the Stoics understood that our mental energy is finite. Every opinion we form, every stance we take, every argument we engage in—they all consume pieces of our limited cognitive resources. As I explored in Silent Strength, true power often lies not in constant expression but in thoughtful restraint and self-mastery.
Seneca put it perfectly:
"To be everywhere is to be nowhere."
When we spread our attention too thin, trying to develop positions on countless issues, we end up with shallow understanding and unnecessary stress.
If you think about it: How many heated opinions have you formed in the past year about things that now seem completely irrelevant? How much mental energy did you expend debating issues that you ultimately had no control over and that had no real impact on your life?
The Opinion Tax
Having endless opinions comes with hidden costs:
Mental Fatigue: Constantly forming and defending viewpoints is exhausting. It depletes the energy you could direct toward areas where you can make a real difference.
Identity Attachment: When we publicly stake out positions, they often become part of our identity. Then we defend these opinions not because they're correct, but because changing them feels like a personal failure.
Relationship Strain: Unnecessary opinions can create friction in relationships when neither party has meaningful influence over the issue being debated.
Diluted Focus: The more opinions you maintain, the less deeply you can think about the few topics that truly matter in your life.
Marcus Aurelius advised:
"If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment."
Having fewer, more carefully considered opinions isn't about being disengaged—it's about being selective with where you invest your mental energy.
The Freedom of "I Don't Know"
There's remarkable liberation in being comfortable saying:
"I don't know enough about that to have an opinion." "I haven't formed a position on that issue yet." "That's not something I've chosen to focus on."
When I started practicing this, I discovered several benefits:
Better Conversations: People actually respect honesty about knowledge gaps more than confident but uninformed opinions. In Winning Arguments, Losing Friends, we explored how choosing connection over being right can transform our relationships—this is a perfect example of that principle in action.
Mental Space: By letting go of the need to have positions on everything, I created room to think more deeply about issues I genuinely care about.
Reduced Anxiety: Not feeling compelled to keep up with every controversy or news cycle lifted a weight I hadn't realized I was carrying.
More Learning: When I stopped rushing to judgment, I became a better listener and learned more from others who had deeper knowledge.
Epictetus taught:
"It is impossible for a man to learn what he thinks he already knows."
When we release the need to have ready-made opinions, we open ourselves to genuine understanding.
Choosing Your Battles Wisely
So how do we decide which issues are worth our mental investment? The Stoics would suggest applying these filters:
Is it within your control? If you have no influence over an outcome, having a strong opinion may be wasted energy.
Is it relevant to your life and values? Does this issue connect to your core principles or affect your sphere of influence?
Do you have adequate information? Forming opinions without sufficient knowledge often leads to error and embarrassment.
Will your opinion contribute something valuable? Sometimes silence is more useful than adding to the noise.
This approach connects with what we discussed in The View From Above—gaining that cosmic perspective helps us see which issues truly deserve our mental energy and which are merely temporary distractions in the grand scheme of things.
The goal isn't to become apathetic or disengaged from the world. Rather, it's to be intentional about where you invest your cognitive resources. As Epictetus wrote:
"Make the best use of what is in your power, and take the rest as it happens."
Opinion Minimalism
Here's how to practice more selective opinion-forming:
1. Implement a waiting period for new issues
When a new controversy emerges, give yourself 48 hours before forming a stance. Often, important additional context emerges after initial reports.
2. Ask "Why do I need an opinion on this?"
Before diving into a debate, question whether your opinion serves any purpose beyond signaling your identity or values to others.
3. Practice saying "I don't have a position on that yet"
Get comfortable with this phrase. Use it liberally. Notice how it affects conversations.
4. Conduct an opinion audit
List issues you've spent time thinking about in the past month. For each, ask: "Did having an opinion on this improve my life or others' lives in any way?"
5. Distinguish between preferences and opinions
It's fine to have preferences (e.g., "I enjoy this music") without developing opinions that require defense (e.g., "This is objectively the best music genre").
📝 Today's Stoic Gameplan
Morning Reflection: Start your day by identifying one area where you've been carrying unnecessary opinions. Consciously release the need to have a stance on this issue.
Selective Information Diet: Choose just one news source to check today, rather than consuming multiple feeds. Notice how this affects your mental state.
Practice Restraint: In conversation today, look for one opportunity to say, "I don't know enough about that to have a meaningful opinion." Notice how it feels.
Opinion Journal: At the end of the day, write down three issues you encountered that you chose not to form an opinion about, and why that decision served you well.
Focused Expertise: Identify one topic that truly matters to you and deserves your deep understanding. Commit to learning more about this single issue rather than forming surface-level opinions on many.
Remember, having fewer opinions doesn't mean caring less—it means caring more deliberately about things that truly matter. It's about quality over quantity in your thinking.
As you go through your week, I challenge you to notice how often you feel the pressure to form or express opinions that don't serve you. Then practice the liberating art of saying, "I haven't thought enough about that to have a meaningful perspective."
Your mind will thank you for the space.
Stay stoic,
StoicWisdoms
Related posts:
8 Must-Read Books on Stoicism for Personal Growth
10 Books That Made Me Think Differently
5 Life-Changing Lessons from Marcus Aurelius
How to Take Action When You Don't Feel Like It
Well put. It reminds me of Plato's words, "Wise men speak because they have something to say; fools speak because they have to say something."
Absolutely right. Sometimes it pays to be silent - choose your battles, conserve mental energy and when it’s time to have an opinion, make sure you’re well informed.